Drowning and Chaos

Most of the time, I do not remember my dreams. There are times that I’ll wake up and remember it being really weird but not know the details of them. There are other times when I do not know if the dreams were part of my reality or if it was all in my head. I never know if it was real or not until the event happens and it turns out to be déjà vu.

In the most recent dream that I remembered, had a lot to do with water and chaos. I was out at a harbor and looking at all the boats that were there. Somehow, I had a boat that belonged to me and I was going to take it out. I was untying the rope that was keeping the boat in place at the dock, and then untying the rope that was on the boat. Suddenly, I just fell into the water. I expected to fall into some deep water of a lake or sea but it was shallow. I ended up falling into water that was only a foot or two deep. The dream went from me on a dock to playing in the water with a friend. We were both just dancing and jumping around in it. I think this was because I was watching Glee and they did a version of Rihanna’s song “Umbrella” on the show and dancing in the rain.

The other portion of the dream was craziness. I was trying to go out to do some simple errands but everything felt so rushed. There were people walking super fast. I think it was a nice, sunny day and possibly a weekend. I felt that no one should be doing this much on a lovely day. Everyone just needed to slow down and relax. I remember getting into my car to go somewhere and there were maniacs in the other cars around me. I was almost hit a few times from people changing lanes or people merging into my lane but trying to pass me up. These were the people that tried to run me off the road. My heart was beating so fast and I was feeling very anxious. Then, my alarm went off before anything else can happen. But it was an intense feeling for me to wake up out of.

I didn’t realize that my dreams had any particular meaning until later in the week. When I was dreaming about all the water and falling into it, it was telling me about the rain that we were going to have. Just yesterday, it was pouring so much that just walking in it made me feel like I was falling in a lake. Then again, there was so much rain that I was soaking wet in my shoes. I’m just happy that I was able to stay out of the rain for most of the day but it was hectic.

 

The other part of chaos turned out to be a warning for work. I’m a new full-time key-holder at American Eagle Outfitters at Tanforan and I let my store manager know that I was going to be on break and was able to work the maximum amount of hours for the week. When I got my schedule, it turns out that the chaos is going to come to me in the 46 hours that I am scheduled to work. It is going to be incredibly hectic and full of chaos on black Friday, which we call green Friday because we make money, since I will be working a 10 hour shift. This week is going to be craziness but I’ll be happy when I see my paycheck.

Liberating Opportunities from Life's Challenges

Living your life always presents challenges. They are always coming at you in all different forms. Challenges may come from a job, getting an education, or getting out of a bad situation. How you go about it makes you who you are. It is a reflection of what kind of person you are.

            I am able to respond to these challenges by putting a lot of thought into what is happening. You try to evaluate the situation, think of options to go about it, thinking about the future and the end result. You take into account of whether the challenge is going to benefit you or not by looking at all the pros and cons. I always try to look for guidance through family, friends, or people that have established themselves in the field that I am going to be challenged.

            Going into a challenge, you would most likely want to prepare for anything you may have to face. Such as moving out, going to college, and doing it on my own. I was the first in my family to go to college since my parents were only high school graduates, at the most. I was able to obtain knowledge of what I was going to get myself into from other counselors at school and older siblings of friends. I tried to get as many views and advices to prepare myself. Knowing that college was going to be a challenge to get into classes, pass them, and graduate, there is the brighter side of getting a better paying job and setting myself up for a better life.

            Another way that I was able to prepare was get two first jobs after high school because I knew that I was going to have to pay any other costs of college that my financial aid was not going to pay for. I was able to work and save up a lot of money because I was working full time at Save Mart, which lots of the people called slave mart because the constant running around and lists of things to do by every manager working, and working part time at American Eagle Outfitters. After school started up again, I decided to keep my part time job in order to go to school full time. I have been at American Eagle for almost four and a half years now and it is going well, getting a promotion and taking on the full time position. Doing full time work and full time school is going to be a challenge but I know it will be liberating, knowing I am getting my education and paying for everything on my own.

            This whole process was a challenge. Moving out and having to find a place to live that was in my budget. Going to college and taking classes that were rigorous but beneficial for me in the long run for my future career. Doing everything on my own is liberating because I know I am able to do anything I put my mind into. Being the independent person makes me stronger and it shows with the people that are around me. Even my roommates were surprised how independent I was when any challenges were brought my way. Every challenge I have faced, there are liberating moments and I get a lot of satisfaction from it.

            Guidance figures like Daru are essential. There is always someone in our lives that we go to for advice. They would be the ones to have your best interest at heart and want to see you do well in anything and everything. They are likely to go out on a limb for us because they get the satisfaction of seeing us move forward and succeed. That might be all they look for because they don’t get any personal gain. There is a trust there and you value their opinion. When there is someone that is going out on such a limb for us and doing anything possible for you, it makes you feel obligated to do right by them and yourself. I would want to be able to do what they did for me, for someone else down the road. They may have had someone help them and they are doing that for us. It is a way of paying it forward. When you have someone that is benefiting you, you are going to want to do the same for someone else.